MUMBAI – MAHARASHTRA – INDIA JUNE 09 , 2013 11.45 P.M.
Sitting in my study in Mumbai and trying to remember Jiah Khan is not easy at this juncture . I met Jiah 7/8 months back . I was approached by her manager and he requested me to train her as she was about to sign couple of big projects soon .
I had seen few scenes of ” Nishabd ” [ 2007 ] , her debut film . Then I watched ” Ghajini ” [ 2008 ] . I had watched ” Housefull ” [ 2010 ] also . That was it . But that is her complete filmography . Just 3 films in 4 years . And it was not a conscious decision . She waited for 3 years for her next break . But the wait was in vain .
After getting call from her secretary , I called Jiah next day . Her mother answered the call . I went to meet Jiah Khan next day . I vividly remember her building , Sagar Sangeet in Juhu . I went to her first floor flat and was ushered in by Jiah’s mother . I sat on the sofa and then few moments later Jiah slowly walked in and sat in front of me .
As has been said by many , she was not a conventional beauty . But I found her stunning , very charming and elegant . She offered me tea and we talked about the modalities of the training . She requested me to start from the coming week .
I came out . But that coming week never came . She kept on postponing the classes . She always messaged me a day prior that since she is under weather , she wont be able to start classes. It went for a couple of weeks .
Finally I lost patience . And when she finally called me one day to start the class , I didn’t answer the call . I curtly messaged back that I have taken another tuition , as I was tired of waiting endlessly . She simply messaged back , ” Oh sorry , but I was really under the weather . ”
Then I lost contact with her . I never cared to call back . I took her to be another spoiled brat . But when I read about her suicide , I immediately remembered above mentioned event .
A sense of remorse engulfed me . Now I am feeling guilty . May be she was true . May be she was really not well . May be she needed people in her life . I would have been a positive anchor in her life . A caring teacher is sometimes more than a caring father . Had I been her tutor , may be the fate would have been different . But it was not destined to be .
I am sorry but I do have fiery temper . Not knowingly or consciously but I have made some mistakes in my life because of my temper . Saying no to Jiah Khan seems to be one of the biggest mistakes of my life . May be the troubled girl child needed an emotional anchor and I know that I could have been a very positive anchor in her life . But as I have said earlier , it was not destined to be .
On behalf of all the students and staff of VIDUR Acting Institute , which is known as Vidur’s Kreating Charakters , I offer my condolences to Jiah’s family . VIDUR Editing Studio , VIDUR Club and VIDUR Theatre also join me in expressing grief . I apologise to her mother , who was so nice to me when I first met her on that day .
I still have Jiah Khan’s cell number but I have no gumption to call her mother . I have no courage to say sorry to her . Today , on a wet Sunday night , I am writing this obituary to express my guilt to one and all .
I don’t know whether I deserve it or not but I seek forgiveness . Jiah’s eyes and her smiling face haunts me and it will torment me throughout my life . As a tutor I should have been more condescending , more understanding and more accommodating . I am 60 years old and she was just 25 .
Farewell destiny’s troubled child . I feel ashamed that I am also in the list of few people , who failed you .
MUMBAI – MAHARASHTRA – INDIA
- Bollywood actor Jiah Khan commits suicide (beta.dawn.com)
- Bollywood mourns Jiah Khan’s untimely death (thehindu.com)
- INDIA: Bollywood actress Jiah Khan found dead (bonusrepublic.com)
- Ghajini film Superstar Jiah Khan has death (gatgetmaster.com)
- Actor Jiah Khan Commits Suicide (filmindustryupdate.wordpress.com)
- Bollywood’s Jiah Khan found dead (bbc.co.uk)
- Jiah Khans Last Tweet On Twitter (indiatimes.com)
- Bollywood actress Jiah Khan commits suicide (judgementdayentertainment.wordpress.com)
- Bollywood actress Jiah Khan laid to rest in Mumbai (vancouverdesi.com)
- Bollywood Actress Jiah Khan Commits Suicide (indiatimes.com)
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